comparison

Pinterest is a blessing. I taught myself how to cook mostly using recipes and tips from Pinterest. Cooking is a useful skill, and it’s far easier to learn in the digital age. Millions of bits of information are available for free. Even if we already know how to cook, we never have to get tired of eating the same old thing. A new recipe is just a click away.

For all its benefits though, Pinterest can also feel more like a curse. Have you ever found yourself overwhelmed at the sheer number of things “everyone” is doing?

Eating all organic. Running marathons. Making busy bags. Going screen free. Going processed foods free. Making an income from home. Cooking everything from scratch. Having a lot of children. Homeschooling. Curating the perfect home decor. Spending $10 a week on groceries for a family of 67. Okay, maybe that last one is an exaggeration!

Comparison is the thief of joy. – President Theodore Roosevelt

You would think I would have this down by now, but I still find myself falling into the comparison trap. I helped to launch a book on this very subject earlier this summer. And…I still fail.

As the old hymn goes, Prone to wander, Lord I feel it…

I follow a very large blogger who seems like a really sweet person. I really do believe that she is and admire many of her qualities. But she does NOT do everything. Her blog is her family’s sole source of income, which means her husband does not work outside of the home and he does a lot of cooking and child care. They do not have any babies or toddlers. They have a house cleaner who comes in periodically.

Once I realized that, it was freeing. How often have we compared ourselves to something that isn’t even reality?

With that in mind, I want to share with you what I do…and what I DON’T. My goal is for this blog to never be a source of guilt. I want you to feel encouraged and equipped, and never torn down.

Things I Do:

Things I Do NOT Do!

  • I do not have a large family. I have one toddler.
  • My one child is not involved in any extra-curricular activities. People with older children often spend time driving them to their various activities. We are not in that season of life yet.
  • I do not homeschool. I have a 1 year old and I do not believe that formal school is necessary at that age. I just parent.
  • We do not eat all organic.
  • I make a very small amount of income from my blog, but it is not the primary income source in my home. Not even close. I’m perfectly okay with that, because I need to put a lot of time and energy into parenting right now.
  • I don’t do much of anything with home decor. The decorations in my home are all either repurposed from my wedding, or they were gifts.
  • I do not get up at 5 AM every morning. I struggle with being anemic and sleep is important if I’m going to be able to chase my toddler all day.
  • I do not blog after my son goes to bed at night. That’s my husband time and I’m not willing to give that up.

What do you do? What do you skip? Let me know in the comments! 

5 comments on “She Isn’t Doing it All…And Neither Am I!”

  1. We do not eat organic.

    I don’t cook every meal from scratch.

    I don’t think blog in the

    I don’t do crafts with my

    I do try to make breakfast and dinner healthy. Lunch is usually junk and I’m okay with That.

    I do stay home with my kids. Somedays we do fun stuff other days we stay in.

    I do let them watch 2 hours of tv in the evening so I can get stuff done while the baby sleeos.

  2. Hi! I found your blog from searching the momblogger hashtag on twitter. Fellow mom blogger here. 🙂 I absolutely love this post and I don’t say that often. I have always loved the quote, “comparison is the thief of joy,” and truly feel it’s something we all have to continuously work on. I myself struggle with the comparisons of larger bloggers and youtube vloggers who admittedly put in far less work to their youtube channel and blogs than I do yet pull in 6 figures a year. One thing I constantly have to remind myself (and my husband helps with this), is that I am doing it because I love it. I may not pull the big youtube views but I LOVE what I am doing and I LOVE creating a priceless gift for my family. Likewise with blogging, it has always been something I had a passion for and with the recent relaunch of my site I am keeping this quote in mind. Thank you for writing this. Exactly what I needed to read today. I look forward to reading more of your posts!
    Kelly’s Vida Parenting + Lifestyle Blog |
    | KellysVida YouTube

    • Hi Kelly! I’m glad you found me! I can relate to comparing myself to other bloggers. It’s easy to do, but it just isn’t productive.

  3. Thank you for your honest post! It is a breath of fresh air. I do not struggle with online comparisons initiated by social media or blogs I follow, but I do struggle with comparisons of my own making with others I know offline. As a new mom, I find myself sometimes feeling like the people around me are judging me or expect more from me than I can achieve.

    The logical part of me knows this is most likely imagined in my sleep deprived, over-worked brain but it has still caused a few emotional breakdowns… More than once recently, I’ve cried and said: “I’m not wonder woman! I cannot do everything!” or “I don’t know how she does it with x-number of kids and I’m struggling with just one baby!” My husband is a true blessing and gift from God, because he helps keeps me grounded, helps relieves stress and does so much.

    I love the Theodore Roosevelt quote.

    Inspired by your post, I made my own things “I do and don’t do” list. And it has really helped my state of mind. 🙂

    – I am a mom of an almost 1-year-old boy and am three months pregnant with our second child. I was super sick almost every day, all day long for the last three months…

    – I work full time outside the home as the sole income provider, and at times my job is high stress. My husband is a stay-at-home dad. A few months ago, we decided together that one of us should stay home with our son during these formative years, and my income pays the bills.

    – I do 60% of the meal prep (not organic and not often from scratch) and probably 20-25% of the household cleaning. My husband does the rest plus most of the yardwork while taking care of our son and helping his elderly parents. Our house is clean but that does not mean it is always tidy, and we have many unfinished projects and things that need fixing. (Like our garbage disposal that has been broken for six months now…)

    – On the side, I am trying to start a freelance business so I can (maybe, one day in a few years) transition into working from home, and I’m helping with a fledgling family business, but I need extra sleep with a teething 1-year-old, being pregnant, and having anemic tendencies.

    – I blog in my non-existent free time (which means inconsistently) but I don’t earn any money from it. Writing is a way to relieve stress for me.

    – I attend church weekly, hold a few leadership positions (just until the end of the year and then I am taking a break!), and try to support ministries like a recent free children’s clothing event our community services provided to our local community. But I find I’m not able to do as much anymore due to work and our son and being pregnant…

    – I probably watch too much TV/Netflix in the evenings when I just need to lie down and not think because I’m exhausted or my head hurts.

    – Sometimes the dishes pile up… for days… (We don’t have a working dishwasher).

    – Both sides of the family (mine and my husband’s) live very close to us and we try to split time between them as evenly as possible each week because we love them all and enjoy spending time with them.

    • I love your list! My first pregnancy was really hard, so I can relate to that. We are all living different lives, and we just have to do the best we can with the situation we have! <3

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